State Of The Blog

So, it’s been nearly three months since my last post on Beets Per Minute.  I’ve read countless blog posts about how nobody gives a damn about where you’ve been when you’re away or what’s been going on, but I’m going to share a bit of it regardless of this “fact.”    I KNOW some of you care (or at the very least have been curious) because you have reached out to me via email and social media to find out what’s been going on.

I finished up my Life Coaching and NLP Practitioner program at the end of March.  I was, of course, VERY immersed in my program with lots of exercises, essays, and practicums, and since I have never been a person who can chew gum and write at the same time, I had to prioritize my time.   I wanted to finish my program up before the month of April.  I was able to finish up all of my work and received word of my final grades and certification just last week.

I’m super excited about this!

I was back in America for nearly the entire month of April.  It was so great to see some friends and family, drive a car, and drink lots of Dunkin Donuts.  I feel terrible that I didn’t get to see everyone — as it turns out, six weeks at home probably would have worked better for that!   However, I got to hang out (quite a bit) with my family dog, Maggie.  Look at how fly she is.  I wish I were as flawless.

Maggie Collage

Much like Elizabeth Gilbert went through a “no carb left behind” experience in Eat Pray Love, I went through a “no FOOD left behind” experience back on my native soil.

 

No food left behind w/ @erinkristinacampbell

A photo posted by Erin Campbell Thompson (@beetsperminute) on

While I have no regrets about leaving no food behind,  I’ve been spending the past couple of weeks getting back into a routine that’s a little less, well for lack of a better expression, balls to the wall or #YOLO.

I’ve also been continuing to write as a contributor for several blogs over the past few months.  I’m not going to lie; it’s much easier for me to have the editorial structure of deadlines given to me by others rather than setting my rules.  In all honesty, the direction of this blog hasn’t been something I’ve been super passionate about for a while now.

Don’t get me wrong; I love blogging, it’s just — as anybody else who writes a blog knows — it’s hard work.  And I’m all for hard work, but hard work, for me, tends to be much more challenging when my direction and focus have changed.  I have started another blog because I’ve decided that I want to take my voice and my writing in a different direction in addition to continuing to build BPM (or a new health-related blog) in a new direction.

Writing about food and fitness was perfect for me when I started BPM.  I had just passed my NASM exam and began working in the fitness world.  Also, I had become very passionate about exercise and healthy eating as a way to cope with the grief and anxiety I was feeling over the loss of my father.  I was terrified if I didn’t make positive changes, I wouldn’t care enough for myself and my long term eating disorder issues would resurface and take over my life.  What started out as a hobby to write about things that were relevant in my life at the time, slowly became less and less of a passion for me.

Again, I love writing about health and fitness, but my interests have evolved much more in the directions of activism and mental health and how this affects our bodies and lives far more than writing healthy recipes and workouts.  I attribute this as well to going through my intensive coaching education.  If I could make an analogy; before I was looking at my experience through a hole in the wall and now I’m looking at it from inside the damn room.

For a while, this blog, my life, and my career outside it were consumed by weight, food, exercise, and body image. I spent most of the winter slipping into old habits and mindsets because of my involvement with the fitness world and my confusion about how I want to participate in it.  Conversations I was having all day, every day with myself and others seemed to revolve around diet culture and body dissatisfaction in one form or another.  I’ve had to force myself to go on my social media accounts because it’s such a shitshow of negativity.

Does anybody else think social media has gotten SO much worse over the past several months?

 

But I digress, I want to start a different conversation now.  One that will help to address some of the shortcomings I see in the fitness and nutrition worlds and that I no longer want to engage in.  I’m not saying I no longer want to be a personal trainer, but I’m changing my approach to fitness and with the people I train.  It can be difficult to push for change while you’re part of a system that can be so counterproductive at times.

I’ve rambled a bit here, and it’s perhaps a bit confusing.  The Cliff’s Notes (or Monarch, or whatever) for this post are the following:  I’m not sure what will happen with the future of this blog because I am changing direction going forward.  I will most likely start a different blog if I decide to stop Beets Per Minute, but I haven’t decided anything just yet.  I hope those of you who have been faithful readers will continue to follow me on my journey — there’s going to be some great stuff to come!  Don’t forget to check out my other blog, ErIntuition — it’s work in progress and not everybody’s cup of tea, but I like it!  🙂

With that, I’ll leave you with the (NSFW) humorous stylings of Matt Bellasai and why he thinks gyms are the worst!  I don’t exactly feel his sentiments about gyms and fitness, but he certainly isn’t 100% off!

What have you been up to?  Have you ever wanted to change the direction of your blog/personal project?

Let’s connect!

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Send Your Heart This Valentine’s Day

Happy Saturday and Valentine’s Day Eve!  Now, I’m not one to go mad about Valentine’s Day.  I agree that flowers and love and all that good stuff are nice 365 days a year.  Believe me, I spent my fair share of V-Days drinking wine straight out of the bottle and telling people holding hands that they are rude.  I’ve become less bitter.

…Okay, I still drink wine straight out of the bottle (on occasion!).

Anyhoo, if you want to send something cool and unique to a loved one this Valentine’s Day, there’s a really cool app created by ASDA called, “Send Your Heart” App and it sends your actual heartbeat in a musical message via your phone.  It’s super cool!

I sent one to Luke via text message and this is what it looks like.

ASDA #SendYourHeart App

When you press on the play arrow in the center of the heart it plays your actual heartbeat along with the beat of music.

It’s a fun and easy way to send love out to people on Valentine’s Day and it’s great for people who live far away but are always near to our hearts.  Great for expats like yours truly!

Pretty sweet, right?

The app is free and can be installed on both Andriod and iOS.

Who will you send your heartbeat to this Valentine’s Day?

***This post is part of a sponsored campaign through the BlogHer Social Media Influencer program for ASDA’s Send Your Heart app.  Even though I will be compensated for my participation, all opinions are my own.   

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Daily Intention: Clarity

We do not see things are they are.  We see things as we are.

-Anais Nin

Have you ever been in a mental fog?  I’m sure you have.  I know that I have been so many more times than I can count.  The problem with experiencing mental fog and tunnel vision is that we tend to lack the perspective we need to broaden our thought horizons.  In other words, we only digest one version of everything we experience.

For instance, I used to suffer from repeating the same mistakes in every relationship I had.  It was quite foolish looking back now because the scenario never worked out the way I thought I wanted it to, and that was because I kept doing the same things and expecting different results.   I believe they call this the “definition of insanity.”    I wouldn’t go that far, but I will say that the less open we are to insight and self-examination, the more likely we are never to break out of habitual patterns of self-destruction.

Wahey, that’s a mouthful, right?

So, today’s intention is clarity.  Clarity is all about seeing “the big picture” and allowing ourselves to gain beneficial personal insights.  We may not always like what we learn about ourselves, but when you can discover ways that you may be sabotaging your happiness it’s beyond valuable.  In my post, Why I’m Happy My Husband Pointed Out My Worst QualityI talked about how my husband pointed out my chronic habit of feeling like a victim.  At first, I felt insulted and uncomfortable about his insights, but giving myself time to separate from all the content of my “story,” I was able to see that yes, I had in fact been sabotaging connections because spent so much time feeling like I was under attack.

I’m not convinced that I wouldn’t have been able to gain this valuable insight to myself without my husband because clarity is something we gain from within ourselves but I am fortunate enough to have ended up with someone who loves me enough to want me to live a happy and drama-free life.

Tips for achieving clarity in your life

  • Spend time with people who have values and goals in alignment with your own.
  • Limit mind-numbing television and social media scrolling and replace those activities with reading motivational books or time outdoors in nature.
  • Visualize yourself free of drama and how you ideally would want to resolve problems or setbacks you may be facing.
  • Eat more unrefined foods and limit the toxins and stimulants you take in. Caffeine and alcohol can significantly impair clarity.
  • Keep track of your goals, whatever they are!

And now for today’s Daily Intention Workout!

Daily Intentions Workout

Daily Intentions Workout Challenge

Do you seek clarity in your life?

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Am I Enough?

Happy Friday! This week has been super stressful, but I was able to accomplish things way ahead of schedule so let’s pop champagne for that! (Unless you don’t drink in which case have some chocolate?)

This week’s posts were all about addressing some of the areas we can let negativity dictate our lives without even knowing it. Whether is’s giving yourself ultimatums, taking criticisms personally, or the inability to accept compliments — we have got to be better aware and to shift the way we talk to ourselves.

Today I want to share a video with you that is one of my absolute favourites. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the London-based psychologist, Marisa Peer, but if you’re not, you should be. This video is a talk she gave at AwesomeFest called, “The Biggest Disease Affecting Humanity: I Am Not Enough” and it is brilliant. If you have ever asked yourself the question, “Am I enough?” this talk is for you.

I wanted to close off the week with this inspirational video.

And something for you to print out and put on your mirror/desk/computer/wherever.

Iamenough

You’re welcome.

Have a great weekend!

How was your week? 

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Why I Couldn’t Accept Compliments

Happy Thursday, everybody. Wow, it’s January 21st already, and we’re three weeks into 2016. Crazy! How are you doing with any resolutions or changes you are looking to make for yourself this year?

One of the changes I want to make this year is to stop suffering from the “compliment complex.” I’m linking up with Amanda at Running with Spoons for Thinking Out Loud today to talk about something I think most of us are suffering from (especially women) — how to start accepting compliments.

acceptcompliments

I cringe whenever I even think about how difficult it is for most of us to accept praise. We say things like, “oh this old thing” or “shut up, I haven’t lost weight” or “you’re crazy, I’m not amazing” to the slightest amount of praise. There are only two words we ever really need to say when somebody gives us a compliment, and yet, we rarely ever say them: Thank you.

I am still in shock whenever someone says something like that they love my hair, or they think I have lovely cheekbones. I am always looking to see if the person saying it to me is talking to me or someone standing behind me. Once I (hopefully) discern that they are in fact addressing me, my first reaction is to say, “my hair is terrible, it’s thin, and a disaster” or “my face is wide”. Instead of just accepting that person’s praise I not only refute it but argue that they are ‘seeing things’ that aren’t so. Or, I take it as far as putting something else on myself down so that I can justify accepting praise.

“Just take the compliment” — is what my inner voice wants to hear when I bounce praise off myself, but even still, I can’t seem to just (shut up and) take the compliment.

Why is it so difficult to accept complimentary statements others make about us? Why does it make us feel so uncomfortable?

Years ago, while I was living in New York, I used to have this one particular friend. She was well-educated, attractive, and friendly. In fact, we ultimately became friends because she once complimented my shoes at a bar. This friend was so different from most of the women I had been surrounded by in my twenties. For starters because of how accomplished she was, but mostly because she would always say, “thank you” when complimented. I remember thinking to myself, “this might be the first friend I’ve ever had who wouldn’t sandwich compliments with self-deprecation rebuttals. ”

Photo credit

I have to admit — despite the fact I liked her, I had a hard time understanding how easy it was for her to accept such praise without tearing something else about herself down.

Photo credit: Buzzfeed

I know that sounds ridiculous, but I mean, I was so used to hearing everyone else doing everything they could to talk other people out of any positive decisions they made about them, and this girl was just like, “I know.”

How dare she just accept it when somebody tells her she’s beautiful or smart?

But what made me the most uncomfortable about her was how she used to compliment others (including yours truly). For a while, I had convinced myself that she was only doing it so I would give her compliments back. Instead of finding my friend confident and kind, I was suspicious of her motives and decided she was arrogant.

Why I Couldn’t Accept Compliments

Looking back now, I can honestly say that the reason my friend’s confidence made me feel uncomfortable was because I was envious of her.

What took me years to understand was that I wasn’t envious of her in the sense that I wish I looked like her or had her job or anything like that. I was envious of her because she could find a place inside of herself that said, “I’m going to be gracious and accept kind words about myself from others.” Let’s face it, we are living in a society where many people tear one another down as a means to feel better about themselves. How dare any of us believe in ourselves or say kind things about others.  The truth was, I spent most of my life tearing myself down because I didn’t feel like there was anything praise-worthy about me.

All my life, I’ve heard the phrase, “self-praise is no praise”. But if you ask me now, self-praise is the only way we can accept any praise at all. It’s not arrogant to think highly of yourself or your capabilities; it seems quite foolish not to. Speaking from my experience, I know I have struggled with accepting compliments due to my low self-esteem. However, for others, it has less to do with their self-esteem and more to do with them having been conditioned to be humble when it comes to accepting praise. After all, confident people can often be labeled as arrogant, and that is too bad in many cases.

The reality is this: When we receive complimentary statements, it is because someone is trying to connect or identify with us. When somebody we know or even a complete stranger says something kind about us whether it’s our nail polish colour or an idea we’ve had, we have a responsibility to ourselves and greater humanity to take a moment to allow our inner voices to change the conversation between our ears. I believe, if more of us can step up and own the praise we receive, the more of us there will be to give it genuinely in exchange. Confidence should not be considered a stigma.

 

So, the next time you receive a compliment just smile and say “thank you” and pay it forward.

Do you have trouble accepting compliments?

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